We need to get down to the park, reduce that build up of pain inducing cortisol and chase some squirrels.

t would be all too easy to dwell on the deficits, on the wrong things in the relationship we had, particularly when I see other daughters with their mums; when I see how relationships evolve and blossom, as daughters become mothers themselves or enjoy careers, always supported by the bond they have with their mother.

Right now, I’m angry. Very angry.I want to be the person who rails against the world and shouts until someone listens. I want to be responsible for creating and demanding change.

How can we possibly be happy orpositive, how can we go on or move forward when we are grieving? Would we be denying that the verything we are grieving for ever existed if we did? Are we denying the existence of griefitself and will it come back to haunt us later?

I levered myself out of bed at silly o clock this morning because I wanted, needed, to see the sunrise. Now in our current lockdown state, I wouldn’t be able to travel far, so this wasn’t going to be a glorious sunrise, viewed over my favourite seascape

The Quiet Man wasn’t amused that I referred to our kitchen as the "most mundane of places" in a previous ‘blog.’ He wasn’t particularly appeased when I suggested I could change it to say an "ordinary, everyday place" instead.